As you guys have seen over the years, I write a lot about love. Love is the neverending lesson of life. Just when you think you have an understanding of it, you learn something new. As most of you all know, I had a son in November and I know EVERYONE says this but you really don’t have a concept of LOVE until you have children. So you hear the words “unconditional love”, that is exactly what you inherit when you have a child. So I broke down the concept of “unconditonal love” and through all of my thoughts the only thing that made any sense to me was the word: commitment.
Last week when I was in LA, I was talking to my great friend and writing compadre j.Que about this very subject and he said something to me that I hadn’t thought about: When using the word love, we should replace it with the word commitment. So, “I love you” really means, “I am COMMITTED to you.” When you have children you have the most insane feeling of commitment for them. That commitment to take care of them, that commitment to raise them up right, that commitment to be as influential in their lives as possible. That is the kind of commitment you need to to have with your partner in life/spouse.
The problem is most people don’t equate the word love with commitment. So people say it and it may be how they feel but love is so much more than a feeling, it’s the ability to commit. When people say God is LOVE, the meaning is that God is committed to us. Committed to our lively hood. Most of us aren’t even committed to ourselves much less anybody else or God for that matter. We have to get to the true meaning of love. It probably will take your entire lifetime but as long as you are open to finding it and you have an understanding of commitment, you’ll be on the right path.
PS: People may not want to hear this, but LOVE (commitment) is a concious decision. Don’t get that twisted. You can either decide to commit or not to but it is a choice. I’m just rambling on now, you get the point though. 🙂